Grace has said her first English word of Mamamam - for Mama.  After a few days of "mamamam" she is now occasionally looking at me and saying "Mama".  It isn't in plentiful supply but it's a beautiful thing to hear!  Ryan and Sean tell me this is not a real word and they haven't really seen her say it. But Pat and Ethan have heard her when she is leaning toward me with longing in their arms or on the floor reaching for me.  I guess the context she wants to use my name right now is out of desperation.  So when Sean and Ryan say, "Where's Mama?" real happy, she is not at all interested in saying "Mama!" ......yet!

Besides Mama, she also said another word this week. When we asked "How old is Grace?" she replied with outstretched pointer finger  and said-- "Uh!"  Now this, say Ryan and Sean, is a REAL word and thus must be her first word. 

Note: She did say a few Chinese words that we could understand, namely "Mama" and "Baba" (for Daddy) while in China in reference to her Foster parents. Grace only spoke these words during the first 3 days we had her. Alas, we didn't  get it on video to prove it but we both attest that she did indeed say these words when she was sad.  And then at her first Dr. appointment while getting all of her shots she said "Boo!  ah - Boo!!" over and over again and Boo (spelling questionable) means "No" in Chinese.

Grace is now crawling and cruising with a new delight and excitement about exploring her world.  Within just a few short days she went from taking just 2 crude hand & knee moves to fluidity in motion.  The move was born out of desperation - "Must get to Mommy" who was always within just 5 - 10 feet either getting dressed, cleaning the high chair, picking up toys, etc.  I'd hear some fussing, then quietness, then suddenly look and there at my feet was the face of a little angel with arms outstretched imploringly to be held.  It took her about a week to discover that not only is it wonderful to be able to reach your mother wherever she may be, but be able to have a new found freedom.
Yesterday, all of a sudden Grace was everywhere! We'd put her down and within a few minutes say, "Hey! Where'd she go?!" Inevitably, the dog dishes were the favorite draw as were all the trashcans (now elevated out of her reach).  I spent this morning vacuuming, sweeping, and mopping to keep my little one safe and clean in her new explorations.  After all, it only took one little apple stem this AM and a choking fit to motivate me to get moving on this task of a higher level of baby proofing. I know that this stage comes with greater challenges but it also comes with more contentedness because our Grace is a mover. Look out world -- here comes Grace Lu Fitzpatrick!

Yes, Grace is starting to stand on her own. Mostly she likes to stand for about 3 seconds and then fling herself forward into our arms. She smiles this wonderful "I did it!" smile while standing and then a gleefull "Here I come!" smile when she's done.  Even within the few days that she began this trick, we're seeing how she's discovering how neat the standing trick can be and how versatile it is too! Now she can hold onto the ottoman and then stand just long enough to reach the other ottoman. I also see the wheels going in her head with "Now, how do I sit down without falling -- oh bother, just. ..  (boom) fall down!"  It's fun to see not only the motor skill, but equally fun to see her confidence in us. She knows we'll catch her.  On the most fundamental level, she knows we can be trusted.  Isn't that wonderful? 

Happy one month home anniversary to us and to Grace!  Grace was running a fever for the first part of this week but licked it and is back to her sweet wakeful self. I have to admit that having a sleepy baby was kind of nice for a few days!  Overall, however, it's been a month of more firsts, more AND less sleep, more development with sitting, standing, and grasping, and most notably, more attachment.  Below you will find a hodgepodge of pics from this week.  You will find Grace getting help from her brothers for all sorts of fun things, like airplane rides, upside down rides, shoulder rides, piano playing in traditional and novel ways, and yes, drooling.  You'll see Grace learning that glasses are hard to figure out but so is this whole big new world she's in. You'll also see that Grace has learned that her Daddy's chest is a nice big bed and that her doggy is still a curiosity.  She also played wtih a doll this week (thank you Kelly!), and she discovered that her hair is yummy to suck on. 

For Pat and for me, this month has had its fill of change as well and it was easy to see the major advances for us on a week by week basis:
Week One -- Jet Lag and the fog of sleep deprivation as Grace tries to change to our time zone.
                        Thankfully, my Mom was here to help us survive and keep the household running!
Week Two -- Grace is now on our time zone but is not sleeping through the night so sleep deprivation for us continues. 
                        The adjustment curve to life with Grace and our four boys without a tank filled with sleep is difficult.
Week Three -- Grace sleeps a bit more at night, we feel more human, and we see the light at the end of the tunnel.
                         By week's end, Pat and I are laughing and joking with one another again after a long draught of survival mode.
Week Four -- Life is much more manageable and although we still aren't getting a full night of rest, it is enough to function well.
                        We're getting out with Grace and getting into more of a system at home and life is looking and feeling much better!

There it is, my money shot of all of my kids together for their first picture as siblings. It, quite frankly, moves me to tears.   From looking at our brood of five you would think that having children has been an easy affair for the Fitzpatricks, but that is far from the case.  All of our birth children came after infertility tests that were not only physically invasive and difficult to bear, but emotionally draining and crippling.  The result of a year of this was the Dr. raising his hands in the air and saying, "I have no idea what is the problem, but take a little fertility drugs and hopefully it will be like fertilizer to your infertile soil."  One and half years of "fertilizer" and Adam came joyously to us. His middle name is Samuel, meaning, "Asked of God." What joy it was to my heart to be a mother after all of those years of tears.  For the other boys it was more Clomid and more years of trying until their conceptions. The twins, because they were identical, were not the result of any extra eggs, but rather just an extra special double blessing. Then for our last precious boy, I was on my last month of fertility drugs after being told that I couldn't have any more Clomid because having more could lead to cancer concerns.  This was it for me. No more pills.  Now or never.

Praise the Lord, as we nearly gave up hope of another child, God blessed us yet again.  At the same time, however, knowing that there would be no more fertility pills for me, I gave up my deep seated desire to have a little girl.  I bowed my will to the Father's and knew He had a perfect plan, and we moved on.  Then suddenly during my 40th year of life, I became pregnant 3 times and lost all 3 of those babies.  It was devastating to me, but I see now that it began to warm in my heart the idea of more children.  Just one year later, God brought our friend Chip to our now primed soil of readiness and we felt God leading us into the journey of adoption.   Not only would we be rescuing a child and giving her a home, but God would end up using it to soothe over the barren waters of my own soul and give me a daughter of great joy.  Neither of us felt complete in our family until Grace came to us, and God used the process of adoption to bring her to us and round out our family circle.

There are many verses in my Bible marked with dates that show how God was working in my heart. One of them comes quickly to mind as I look with such joy upon this picture of my children -- my five beautiful and wonderful children!  It is marked in my Bible on 8-25-91 when I was pregnant with Adam, and it couldn't be more true today than it was then.  "He settles the barren woman in her home as a happy mother of children."  Thank you God, for your long, painful at times, yet perfectly crafted journey to making me such a happy mother of children. 

Grace has never been on her stomach that we can figure. She hates being put into this position whereas with all of our other kids, that's the number 1 sleeping position and the first position the kids ever got used to. She usually lays there like beached sea creature who can't figure out how to get back into the "swim" of things.  We try to get her on her stomach though every day for a little while just to build up those muscles and to help her learn how to use them to aid in her mobility issues.  Ethan has a knack, however, of getting her to like it. He has actually had her on her stomach reaching for, of all things, an apple for several minutes at a time.  I don't know if Grace will ever crawl or just go straight to walking. Time will tell, but for now, we give Grace a little exercise every day. Afterall, she is eager to be mobile. If she only knew that going belly down would be the quickest route to mobility!  You know, I've always loved my kids at 5 months of age and have said in the past that it is the best age. They are generally just learning to sit and are happy to play with toys. This is where Grace is at developmentally but not mentally. So for her, she is NOT content to just sit even though she has just recently mastered the art of sitting in this past week. She is eager for the NEXT stage which is mobility. The quicker she can get there, the happier, we believe she will be.  One thing at a time, dear Grace. You'll get there and for now, we're very proud of your efforts and your accomplishments!

This blog may not be very interesting but some of you have been asking me how Grace likes her room and she loves it!  Today I finally snapped a few photos of her enjoying her crib, reaching out to the dog, and her latest silent pastime, drooling. To my delight, she seems enthralled with the hanging butterflies above her crib, her crib toy, and most of the items in her room.  She has yet to sleep in her crib. For now, she sleeps in a Pack 'N Play in our room at night and another one downstairs during naps. This way we can be close to her for when she wakens and she does waken  A LOT!  I generally have her in her room, however, once a day to play in her crib and on the floor so that she can begin to enjoy her room and her eventual sleeping domain.  She seems to really love being in there and the pictures play out some of the fun she has in there. Notice that she had fun today reaching out to Andre and having him reach back with wet "kisses". 

Someone at the airport said she is like a little actress with many faces and you can see some of those many faces below.  Yesterday I was with a friend and she only basically showed one face - that of the one that's the 8th picture featured below.  It is the one she shows to most people in new situations because she is busy studying them or whatever is around them. Don't worry Jaime, she'll be smiling at you soon! Once she has studied the environment, she starts to engage her smiley face. Grace loves to see smiles and to hear laughter and it usually brings out the smiles in her so the boys and Pat and I do a lot of smiling and laughing around here - more so than usual! 

And a note about the drool -- if you look closely you can see it in most of the pictures below. Grace soaks through 3-4 drool bibs every day. I'm glad she wasn't doing this in China or I would have never been able to keep her dry!  But two days ago Grace had another tooth break through so I'm hoping the drool will start to slow down now for a little while. We'll see!  Now Grace has 8 teeth at 10 months old. Wow.  That's 8 more than my boys had at this age! No wonder she's drooling!!

Sharon

Grace has been home for 4 days and it's a big new world for her.  When I brought her downstairs this morning I noticed that she is still looking at everything with big eyes of curiosity.  She hangs over my arm just to get a view of the tiles on the floor or the rugs, or the knobs on the cabinets.  I can hardly begin to imagine how big this new world of hers is and how daunting it must seem to have everything be so new and strange.  Just 2 weeks ago she was probably spending most of her day on the hip of her Foster mother or in a cardboard box surrounded by blankets.  Her world consisted of most likely a few small rooms and I doubt she got out much beyond the doorway to that house or apartment.  Since then she has been sleeping in 4 star hotels, ridden on buses, a van, and taxis, flown on airplanes, and now lives in what by all accounts to her is a mansion.

The sounds and the familiar smells of China that engulfed her for 9 months are now a thing of the past. Oh sure, we have CDs and some food items from China that bring some familiarity to her, but basically it's all just. . well. . . different.  Add to this the addition of 4 brothers and a dog and yes, changing her internal time clock by 12 hours and you have even more adjustments to be made.

So how is our little girl handling all of it? Very well. Last night we slept from 10 PM to about 5 AM and was patted softly back to sleep through 6:45 AM.  She is enjoying PB& J sandwiches for lunch, bagels with cream cheese for breakfast, pasta for dinner, and certainly her 4 bottles every day that she drinks down with what only can be described as complete rapture.  She also rolls her eyes back in that rapturous state when you rub her tummy -- oh joy!  

We're having to wake her during her longer afternoon naps and then keep her awake as long as possible to get her though the nights and onto the new schedule but for the most part, Grace is handling it with a good spirit. She does love to be held and to see her new world so our time is not our own, but who can resist this little one when she smiles at you and reaches our her hands to be picked up. 

This morning she was playing with toys just within my legs on the floor but she turned and fussed to show me she wanted a change and wanted to be held. But the minute I held her, she was happy again and was eager to get back to those same toys - the difference being only that she was in my arms.  I say it again, how can you resist that kind of desire to be loved?  It reminded me anew of the deficit she has in her heart and of her need to be loved. The best way she knows how to do this is by reaching out to us to hold her. Oh, it does make life harder on us to get things done, but right now our job is to show her she can trust us -- that we won't let her down - that we will be there for her no matter what. 

I haven't been taking too many pictures. But here you will find a few snippets of life with Grace and we promise to start taking some more pics in the days ahead for those of you who want to continue to follow along with us in watching Grace adjust to us and us adjust to Grace. By the way -- she is now beginning to roll over, and sleep on her side.  She has a great desire right now to MOVE which means standing, rolling over, flexing - anything that has movement attached to it. I think that when our girl can crawl and feel more secure in her sitting and standing, this world will only get that much bigger for her!

Sharon